Monday, June 9, 2014

                                 When sparks fly

I get so frustrated with this weird unfair  life   ...I wish this world was so different , I was born in. But a even simpler fix would to have been to be born in another body. (female body) there are so many people that are attracted or could be interested in me for whatever reason. but cause my gender (male ) , and or how it's not acceptable to be who you are and like who you want no matter sex ! makes this place for people like me  not as happy of a place as it could be . and very unfair as we have no choices with out some kind of negative consequence, fear of what others think ,family members think ,friends and peers think. Thoughts of being less of a man cause you may like another man or devalued as a human in general , cause of some of your  sexual attractions  there are so many shades of grey of human interactions. We are all made to have lots of interpersonal relationships may it be male and  female relationships male and male relationships  or having relationships with male and female both its all totally natural and really what were are born to do ...

 Ever met someone you think you could be very sexually comfortable , attracted to, have sparks or butterfly's or just wanted to kiss for whatever reason it maybe? (pure animal magnetism)   that was to the same sex , and denied because your  gender .
 cause guys may be afraid of what others  may think or call them due to the social norms fag or  gay or made to feel like a fag or be made to feel like you are doing something wrong in someone Else's eyes or afraid some kinda negative repercussions of any sort. 

Id say I have  missed my fair chances  with straight men that thought I was attractive
that I could tell  we had lots in common or simply had sparks and mesh really well or simply admire you for whatever reason ,and could not simply connect as my gender was wrong ,and it was not socially acceptable !  where they say if you were a girl we be a perfect match 
or if you were a girl id fuck you ,  I mean don't get me wrong... it's not hard to get the secret encounters and what not with the straight men and blow and go's or secret straight lover behind closed doors  but even that is somewhat devaluing in some sorta ways as someone would want you secretly but not out and openly

What has this  place come to when were have to suppressed our human desires when its not hurting anyone to have them ??? 
I  mean who does it hurt to love who you want if it feels right? or to have sex with who you want if it feels right and its something you want to do  ?
I think if everyone was allowed to love who they wanted  this world would be much happy place for us all . less divided less confused broken race  
I just wish i could have a chance to actually be love by a guy i like regardless of my gender, like the way a man loves a woman with all his heart his heart , want to protect, take care of, squeeze hold comfort and be with ... with no judgments of what others may think ! and no care in the world besides are we happy :) 

just wanted to start my blog again  hope you enjoy and stay tuned 

Monday, November 5, 2012

a shoot for

Hey there so I  was contacted by my friend to take some pictures for her site called it was a very fun shoot and we had a lot of fun a got lot of a great pics 

 it was a really fun shoot , pretty girl , here are a few shots from this shoot enjoy leave feedback

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Someone I admire professional !

I know this photographer named Danger Ninja, and his work is awesome. I admire him for several reasons. Those reasons are that his work is amazing, cutting edge, and trend setting.
This artist I look up to is a Portland base photographer, where there are lots of fashion forward people to network with.
I have no doubt that the city contributes to his stunning work.
For example, Portland provides great shooting locations, natural props, and gorgeous models.

I found Danger Ninja on Myspace and Facebook because of his killer photos that continue to grab my attention. His models and lighting are perfect and different from any others that I have seen. He's a sine qua non (without any comparison or no equal) as far as I'm concerned.

His style grabs attention from all the local fashion gurus and even some international magazine companies. His work is innovative and gets plastered in all the popular Portland magazines.

In conclusion, the biggest compliment I could give him is that I want to emulate him professionally and hope to become as famous myself someday!

Friday, October 22, 2010

I love living here because ?

 I love living her because ?

   Cottage grove in a super small town upper end of a large valley in the state of Oregon and  I like living there ! I hesitate to use the word love as it a pretty strong emotion.

I have lived in other town and cities - some smallish like Roseburg and some huge like NY-
but I like living where I do !

Cottage Grove is an old town with some interesting historic sites, and some cool architecture,buildings  and alley ways .
Another reason I like living  here is because it hold lots of unique  possibilities for me to practice my photography .
It has many classic old homes and closed mills  that make great backgrounds for my models.

I also like the location of the town because its close to lakes and rivers where I can swim and fish .
The town is close to larger cites where I can easily find Goodwill's and saint Vinny's to add to my photo props . there are also many chances to get out in the nearby forest or bike ride for miles on the bike paths , or Rollerblade and run /walk my dog !

The town is small! somewhere  around 10,000 so it is sorta laid back and friendly .
when I travel 20 miles north in to Eugene I always notice the pollution in the air because the number of cars and other factors because of its size.

Yes I like living in Cottage Grove .
To me it the right size , has the necessary locations , and its clean and friendly .

my second essay in class :} enjoy

When you hit rough spots in a relationships.How do u get back to normal?

first of all let me start off by saying this is a work of fiction it not true !  It was  the topic , so here's what I came up  with . I'm not gonna mention  names ill use xxxxx for names
enjoy. BTW any feedback on this is great or any of my work for that matter 

When you hit rough spots in a relationships.How do u get back to normal?

I have this friend named xxxxx !
   He is one of my best friends but oh boy do we hit a few rough spots every now and then .

xxxxx likes to be a diva , and wants all of my attention when he wants it for instance, whenever we go out to the club and another friend comes up to me , he gets all jealous as hell !
He wont socialize with anyone . He always always always looks bored, and wants to leave early

xxxxx likes, no -xxxxx love to be in charge ! but never pulls it off very well .

 If xxxxx calls me and I don't respond right back , he gets really upset .
as if he should be the most important person in my life . some of the things he will do is call me and hang up .
he will tell me he's not my friend anymore and he will call me names .

One thing that I found that helps gets up back to normal is to give him space to think it over !
 when he calls ,usually fairly quickly after a blow up , I invite him to come for a visit  (as we live in separate towns ) or I invite him to go clubbing .
I also let him come up with a idea or a planned get together .
  But with xxxxx there's no guarantee that anything will work every time
but for now we still remain best friends

                                                    the end
that was the first essay in my class they only have to be 5 paragraphs  or so :)

Thursday, August 19, 2010

My photo shoot with grace love was awesome :P

My photo shoot with grace love was awesome :P

I had the pleasure of working with grace love !
She was fun, opened minded, creative with her poses, sexy,
had ton's of wardrobe ! It was all around fun.
We went to the Industrial park and Dorena lake (baker bay) to take some on location shot's !
  So ya went to the industrial park and got some awesome shots and we were sweating are asses off then we headed to the lake so we got there and did what what we came to do!
there were cat calls ,whistles someone with binoculars passing around little boys asking for grace's number! a hot guy asking me  to take his pic with his cool car with grace and he standing next to it .
loved   it  but sadly my lights went dead so we did not shoot :[
anyhow here are some of the photos for the shoot ;P